What excatly is it that we are searching for? mmm? I mean, what is it that we think is going to make us wake up every morning with that ummph? That 'je nes ce qoi ' (have no idea if that's spelt correctly, and not even sure what it means, but you get my drift). There is so much talk these days, so much available to us, yet I still struggle sometimes to 'get it'. Get what? ... I guess it is about tapping into that part of us that is all KNOWING. That part that understands that which we, in our human form does not.
I am blessed in that I have the wisdom of my dear friend White Cloud to assist me ... and yet, to be honest, depending on hormones/ attitude/ disposition/ mood/ energy/ weather/ atmosphere/ spiritual alignment/ unseen forces/ shifts/ negative attatchments/ finances/ full moons/ temperature/ dissapointments/ ... you get the gist ... all that knowledge that one has gained ... isn't always able to prove the point that ... however much you have learnt ... it doesn't account for the fact that ... sometimes ... your'e just plain ol' 'OVER IT ALL'.
One would think perhaps that I am exactlty that! NAY! ASSUME NOT! Far from it. Yet I am aware that this can be the case sometimes ... for me and indeed for those around me. I am blessed to live in what I call paradise ... yet on occasions even when the sun is shining on the clear water and the breeze is whispering through the palm trees ... Yes , how idealic does that sound? ... and IS ... I can still feel in a 'OVER IT ALL' mood ... and how ever hard I try and tell myself how blessed I am and that there are people with nothing to eat and no roof over their head etc, I can't seem to manage to pull myself out of it. Self indulgence? Perhaps. Is that so wrong now and then though? If we were perfect we wouldn't be here!
In my youth I struggled with depression for many years. My 'down days' are very different now. I KNOW now that at any given moment nothing will change other than my attitude and suddenly, once more the world seems full of Light again. That KNOWING is such a great comfort and allows me to look at what I need to look at when I am experiencing that side of myself that isn't the bubbly fun loving persona that I choose to represent.
I think that the main thing I'm trying to say, fellow searchers is, KNOW that on your bleaker days that it is only temporary. The questions one asks the skies when in that morose place can be very beneficial , even though we don't hear the answers at that point. ( We cant, our vibration is operating on a level that is unable to accept them) and yet, when we move from that place for some reason the answers , let alone the questions, just don't seem to matter. How strange life is! How strange we are! But ... WE ARE ... and therefore we ... MUST BE .... and it's about time we cottoned on to the fact that we therefore ... MUST BE WHAT WE ARE. And that is what we are searching for and when it is put that way it makes us realise that there is no point in searching because it was there all the time! Amen to that!
Fill your days with Golden Rays my friends.